Distance

“He's changing. Every day more remote, protected, distant. He builds fests now for the soulmate he hasn't found, bricking wall and maze and mountain fortress, dares her to find him at the hidden center of them all Here's an A in self-protection from the one in the world he might love and who might someday love him.”


Always with the walls, aren't we? Building them higher, reinforcing them with stronger bricks, and of course we want spikes on the top. If nobody can get in, we can't be hurt, right?

Nope. All we're doing is running ourselves ragged, the race lost because the one thing we most desire we have kept from ourselves. We've only managed to become isolated from the companionship, the trust, the love. There we are, behind that moat of protection, watching the world from behind locked doors. Enough distance between us and them (whoever "they" are,) and our hearts are safe and sound. And lonely as hell.

My story today has more truth than I wish to admit. I don't want to be the one on the inside, alone and cold. I want to be the one sitting on the top of the highest turret in the castle, holding hands and watching the sunset. Protectionism cannot end well, yet I remain elusive and vague. While I wait.... for what, exactly, I'm not sure. But I know I won't get hurt in the meantime.

I have GOT to get off my ass and do better. I have GOT to put myself out there. No more hiding behind the electrified walls of the internet, or the casual acquaintances that are discarded like stale bread.

You too, okay? Let's try this together. I'll keep sharing my story, you go out and write a new chapter in yours.