Day 4

Day 4...

So having thought about the people you have in your life that you care about, and the ones that aren't there even though you still love them... how about the ones you released from your illusion? Yes, illusion. You don't really think that every lifetime is real, do you? Only an advanced soul realizes that we are given many lifetimes, all with the illusion that each is the only one. More on that another day...

In my current lifetime, I managed to allow a lot of people in that I wanted to be with me forever. We all know that's not possible, forever is way too long for the human soul to survive here on Earth. I'm optimistic I can meet the expectations of our Creator and rejoin those I loved in another life someday. Without that hope, I'd surely not be the bit of sane I am now. The thought of seeing them again brings me great joy.

With that great joy, I've opened myself up for even greater disappointment. I have to stay on the straight and narrow path that God has set for me, and I know I've walked just a wee bit to the port side my whole life. Maybe I'll be stuck with the people I didn't really want in my life forever instead, the price of making the wrong choices being easier to pay.

I chose poorly several times. I've had people I thought were friends that eventually disappointed me by betraying our friendship. I've had partners who didn't live up to their end of the commitments we made. I grew up with a parent that I felt hated me by their words and deeds every day.

I eventually learned who was "ALL IN" and who wasn't. It's not difficult to tell, but you have to be willing to take that hard look at yourself and others before you can figure it out. You won't like looking for the signs, watching for the betrayals, waiting for that excuse as to why someone failed to keep up their end of your bargain. You'll even be disappointed in yourself, having let someone have enough power over you to hurt you. I truly believe that you can't be hurt if you don't give others the power to hurt you. You control your life, not them.

Part of being "ALL IN" is that you never give up on something or someone. You have to give 100% all the time. You can't just decide that "oh well, things will work out", because they never do. You will get your heart broken, your spirit bashed in, but you will be rewarded:

From Illusions: There is never a problem without a gift for you in its hands. You seek problems because you need their gifts.

 Lesson Four: Critique your choices. Do you have people in your life that you want there forever? Or do you have those for which you just "settle"? Have you given any thought to why you chose poorly, when you do? (It's okay, we all do.) Can you somehow avoid those mistakes by keeping the power to hurt you away from them? This is your illusion, after all. Why let someone else spoil it?


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